Alcoholic Son

by Sherry
(Wilmington, NC USA)

This past year has been very difficult for me and my son. He separated from his wife after a 17 year marriage. He has 2 sons.

He has depression and I believe this what started the drinking. He went to talk therapy for 6 months and said it didn't help. He took depression medication for 6 months and said that didn't help either.

I said it takes a long time for the therapy and medicine to help, sometimes 2 or 3 years before you can tell the difference. I said you have to work at it.

He loves his sons more than anything and spends time with them every week. He also works a full time job M-F. He pays child support, but lives with me and I want him to move into his own place.

This is a 40-something man. He says he cannot afford a place of his own. Where we live, it is expensive.

I feel bad for him, however I have asked him to start paying rent in Jan. 2024. It will be a small amount, but everybody has to pay to keep a roof over their head or they become homeless. I have made up my mind he will pay me rent or I will evict him.

I don't owe him anything. He is a grown man if he cannot afford to pay a small amount every month, I have suggested he get a second job. Some people work 2 jobs to make ends meet. He says if he works 2 jobs he won't have time to visit with his boys. I said you have a choice. You will still get to see them sometimes.

I have done my best as a mother this past year and I don't have any regrets.

Please advise me.

Thank you, Sherry

Comments for Alcoholic Son

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Mother's Love
by: Sherry/ NC

I gave birth to my son and I have loved him more than anything all of his life. I have sacrificed for him. He was a a whiney baby; a lot of it. I never lost my patience. I realized he was an infant and couldn't help his uncontrolled whining, but it did get on my nerves. I had to cry myself sometimes from hearing it all of the time.

I have always been here for him and I don't ask a lot of questions. I feel as though I am being taken advantage of sometimes. I do pray for him and me.
A mother's love?
by: Anonymous

I don't know you at all but you are a mother. Your son is going through a very hard time right now. He needs less stress and more love.

Why not put yourself in his shoes. In that you are the one with the drinking problem, lost and down, so your son takes you in.

Would you not want him to understand it takes time to over come things. Just as he is hoping you will give him time to over come his problems.

I sure can understand the rent money to help you with things. But let him give you some input, work with him and again show him that love only mothers have.

I live with my son about the age of yours. My husband is very nasty and my son took me in. So I can see both sides of this.

Just trying to explain that there is always two sides to every story.

Take care and God bless!

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