My Horrible Retirement Journey

by Laura
(Canada)

Did you fall into a depression when you retired? Yes, I was clinically depressed when I retired.

How long did it last? About a year

In your opinion, what helped you to break away from the depression? Psychiatrist treatment, anti-depressant, Psychologist counselling, Taking art classes, exercise

How did you walk out that retirement door? Did you voluntarily retire, or did you leave because of a disability, employer forced you out, etc? No, I wasn't forced out, I was on sick leave due to cancer. I was recovering and starting to come back but couldn't seem to get my energy and mental state to get back to work. I was given a graduated return but had started toying with the idea of retiring a year sooner while on leave. It became too much of a temptation. I think part of it was my husband had retired, had a heart attack and I felt life was too short to continue working. Now my health has returned and I regret being so hasty about retiring.

Were you thrilled to leave your employer or was it a difficult decision? I had mixed feelings. I was afraid to leave my employer which led to my anxiety/depression. Part of me wanted to go back and part of me wanted to retire. I was so confused. It was a difficult decision.

My advice to anyone thinking about retiring, make sure you are ready and that you have some activities lined up beforehand. I didn't. My problem is I have no children nor grandkids to help fill up the lonely days and keep me busy. I keep having to find things to do.

Covid shutdown has put a damper on some of my activities so here I am with too much time to ruminate and think about what I went through.

I know it's useless to dwell on the past and I really try to stop but there are times I wish I could go back and redo.

I hope my story helps someone here.

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