Retired, no purpose

by Jim
(Mississauga, Ontario. Canada)

After working for 47 years, finally retired. it has been about a year since i retired. it has been bored, it has been up and down, first the pandemic lock down, could not go out anywhere,
then my cancer diagnosis with lymphoma, have gone for treatment 6 months, doing fine, got 4 more sessions to go to in which is maintenance.

i am doing good now being at home doing nothing has not being fun. i am 67 years old now still have a mortgage. my wife still works during the day.

i am still trying to find my purpose in life. have lot of interests. my fear right now is making
money, afraid i will be cut off my old age pension because on my interests.

love these meetup groups going to their meetings but everything now is virtual.

thank you. i will keep you guys posted.

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A Longer Explanation
by: Jim, mississauga , ontario

Before i retired, i was wondering if i had free time, how much i would accomplish?

now that i am retired i don't know what to do with my self. i worked with one company for 42 years at the time i was working.

i did do network marketing on part-time basis never made any money but i had a passion. received lot off criticism both from friends and family members now that passion is gone.

i think about doing it again. i am afraid if don't succeed, i will my old age pension that iam
collecting.

i want to get involved. it is funny, all the time i have available, it is just going by and i feel guilty.

i have some courses downloaded in my computer. i am thinking to start off, i need to work on my self. i would like to fill my time with some activities.

i am big fan of personal development maybe i will start with that. health & wellness is maybe what i like to get involved.

right now, i am just slowly coming off cancer treatment. i have the rest of this year to get thru. i am doing fine right now, thanks god.

i have to focus right now what i want to do. i will try to find my purpose.

thank you everybody in this community for your support
No Purpose
by: Canadian Retiree

Hi Jim. First congrats on getting through your cancer treatments, this is a huge victory. I can relate as I beat breast cancer and am almost finished my maintenance treatments. I had 16 rounds of chemo and 6 weeks of radiation.

During my early recovery days from cancer, I decided to retire about a year sooner than I had planned, I too started doubting my decision about retiring. I hated retirement at first. I had no purpose, and went in to a horrible depression.

It took me about a year to climb back up and get going. I joined an art class and started exercising.

I too feel lonely at times as most of my family is gone and live far away. I don't have children, it's just my husband and I and he is not the social type.

I do a lot of Zoom classes and social interactions. I encourage you to keep reaching out even if it's just on Zoom. It does help.
Be Patient
by: Linda/FL

Jim,

I too am early in my retirement days and "going in" I told myself that the first year was just mine to rest and regroup. I knew there would be many adjustments and there has been. Easy does it.

I can see how it requires patience. The days go quickly. For you I certainly see that the health issues and Covid has compounded the adjustments. You had worked for many years as I had too.

I have come to like the virtual connections with people and do some online classes each week.

My husband had retired over three or more years before I did and that too is a different adjustment. Now, with both of us retired we can see the difference.

I have found that it is important to have some daily routine and balance of activities. I wish you the best.
Retired, But Finding New Purpose
by: Ruth Kirkpatrick

Jim, I think Wendy is right on about online groups, there are many and on every kind of topic. Your work of 41 years, bet there are some of the same things you enjoyed.

If you are looking for that where you get response visually, your idea can mix it up with the groups, so, if you're not really wanting to be seen at a given time, or feel like verbalizing a conversation, but need to put your mind on something better for the moment, she is right.

Like here or when and if you are ready, go to the section where there is active daily communications here and ask, people know stuff. Here is the link for the Daily Chatter. You will find conversation here. There's two sides to this site, easy it you know how to get there, but not from here, so click the links. Cheer up. Welcome.

https://community.retirement-online.com/page/daily-chatter

And here is my page on RO. I'll ask to friend you, others will too.
https://community.retirement-online.com/profile/RuthKirkpatrick
Start a Community Project
by: Bernard Kelly - Geelong

As a senior, you would normally have some flexibility in your daily schedule.

This of course is what those still in the workforce dream about, however if you allow idleness to develop, that will have an adverse impact on your zest for living.

Now the current probability statistics show that for anyone aged 65 today, your "estate event" – that’s a polite expression used by the retirement planning industry – is likely to occur for a male at age 93 and for a female at age 95.

But of course, those figures are only the average. Obviously over half of us will be living well into our 90s.

So how will you occupy your time? How can you develop relationships? How can you maintain your mental and physical health?

My current research suggests the solution is to establish a community project.

Let me give you an example. There’s a vacant school site near where I live, and it’s nicely overgrown with trees and shrubs and the concrete pads for the classrooms are all still there.

Effectively it’s been abandoned by the government, but the concern is that someday a bureaucrat will have a need to sell it off. Even with very little open space remaining locally, it probably will be sold for a housing development.

It needs Protection.

Now there will be pockets of land in your locality which will similarly need a Protector – and that’s you!

Every Community Project will have elements how a charity operates – such as grants, volunteers, donations, an extended timeline – but it’s really more likely to be called a "social enterprise" with a Social Mission.

And they are really easy to start – just post a series of posts on your local community noticeboard on Facebook, asking for anyone with a similar concern to meet you for coffee – probably at your home, at 11.00 am on Saturday.

Perhaps only a handful will turn up. But that’s enough. Allocate tasks and "portfolios" to these core members, and set them the task of establishing a series of achievable goals.

Your goal of maintaining your personal zest for living will then be well underway.

Bernard Kelly studies how retirees can maintain their zest for living. His email is bernardkellygeelon@gmail.com
Virtual Meetings
by: Wendy, Retirement Enthusiast/Coach

Jim --

You might want to change your perspective on virtual meetings. Please consider all the benefits of online social opportunities:

-- They are fun and you learn from many

-- You get to socialize from the comfort of your own home (in your comfy chair, no going out in too-hot weather or cold/ice/snow)

-- they keep you safe as you likely have a compromised immune system right now

-- you can meet people worldwide, not just your local community

-- most are free

I encourage you to participate in more online groups. This is where our society is today. We can't safely socialize with strangers -- so why not enjoy your social life online?

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