Retired without a direction or reason for being

by Andy Andrews
(Lancaster, NH)

I retired in Feb. 2010 and have been lost ever since. I call it retirement depression.

We have moved to a house we inherited and the renovations are taking some of my time but for the most part I feel like a fish out of water.

I am use to a regimented life style. I have so much energy and no outlet. This site has helped me realize that there is life after retirement so I will be trying to find constructive thing to occupy my time. There is a need for our knowledge and experiences.

Habitat needs skills I have and I plan on joining the Civil Air Patrol in my area. I have seen my parents wither away to nothing during there retirement and will not let that happen to me.

Wendy: Go For It, Andy! It sounds like you've been down BUT are on your way to a successful and rewarding retirement.

You might consider joining my email group for Retirement Transition just to chat with us, via email, on a variety of transition topics!

Look at my Retire to the Internet pages. I make a supplemental retirement income with my websites and I have my e-businesses to work on daily (total addiction here.. love it!). I retired in April 2010. Recently John (retirement transition group) started a solar website and it's really helping him through the depression days.. something to work on, new challenges, keep yer brain thinking while passing along that lifetime of knowledge stuck in your head, and hopefully he will soon have a new income to add to his pension.

Andy, FIND your Reason for Life. We all have many blessings, but you can get into a funk in life and are blind to them, FIND THEM!

Just think, by saying what you did in the title to this page, I think the unspoken message is that WORK was the most important piece of your life and your reason and direction in life.

NO WAY!

Work should be the means to live life, to have an income and find a balanced life, but not the meaning and definition of your life.

WHO are you, Andy? Find Yourself Again!

Comments for Retired without a direction or reason for being

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An Empty Mind is not a Devil's Workshop ....
by: Retd. Prof. (Mr) Durgesh Kumar Srivastava JiBhaiya@gmail.com New Delhi, India

Dear Andy,

I agree with what Wendy and Ronald advise you about your problem. You and your work are not one and the same thing.

Let me narrate to you two stories from my life. When I was a young boy of 12 or 13 years, I began going to a hair cutting saloon near my house on my own. It was a one man business with a small road-front room just about 3 feet wide and about 6 feet long. At the other end of this small room was a curtain. On my first visit to the saloon the door was open but the hair cutter was not there.

From behind the curtain came sounds of a TABLA being played expertly. (A TABLA is a pair of two drums - one of low height (about 10 inches) but wide (about 1 foot wide) and the other drum a little bit taller about 15 inches tall but narrower (about 9 inches wide) It is a hand-made percussion instrument which the player pays with one hand on each drum.)

I lifted the curtain and peeped inside. The hair cutter was playing expertly on the Tabla and another man was sitting near him. After he finished his tabla playing, he asked the young man to continue and practice and he came out to give me a hair cut. He told me that he was fond of this percussion instrument and had learnt it from his father who was a well known Tabla player.

He informed me that he gave free tabla lessons to anyone who was interested to learn playing Tabla. The young man behind the curtain was one of his students. I asked him what his fees was. He told me that he did not charge any fees. While my hair cut was going on the young man emerged from behind the curtain, touched the feet of the hair-cutter as a token of respect and left. I was much impressed.

On another occasion, when I went to his saloon there was a paper pasted on the closed door announcing that Ustaad Ji (Hindi for trainer) is out of station and would come back in three days.

When I went to his saloon after his return he told me that he had gone to Fatehpur, a nearby city, to be a judge in a music contest. Later, he made the revelation that he was in fact a pensioner and was carrying on, after retiring from service, his family's traditional profession as a hair cutter and his hobby of playing the Tabla. He always resented a picture of happiness and contentment.

I once met a retired railway yard master who did not have a pension. He told me that he taught Tabla to girls and charged a small fees to support himself and his wife. He also had a hobby of visiting various places to speak at religious gatherings on the RAMAYAN, the sacred book of the Hindus. he gave these lectures free and used his railway free passes to cover the travel expenses.

Dear Andy, you do what you love and I assure you you will be a happy man. Don't run after money or work.
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Retd.Prof.Mr.Durgesh Kumar Srivastava
New Delhi India, 6 Jan 2011 JiBhaiya@gmail.com
Precious Life
by: Michele

Not sure when this was posted.... But I love retirement.

I don't have enough time in the day to do the things I want. I volunteer. Take my dog to the nursing home. Visit people. Go to the "Y". Walk w/my dog. I don't have anyone to go w/besides her. Sometimes a friend comes along. Crafts. Fixing up my place.. needs lots of work. Hope u r finding fun stuff to do.

Must have FUN! Good luck.

Wendy: Michele, Sounds like you've got a great retirement! I'm quite the same.. can't quite believe how good life feels right now!
Retired without a direction
by: Anonymous

Here is information on a book that I am finding especially helpful to work on new directions after a life event. It is probably out of print so I found a copy in the local library.

Barbara Sher: "I could do anything if I only knew what it was".

She includes exercises and actions in the chapters. You already have done something by knowing what you liked about working, that environment can be recreated in many different ways, start an idea list and take some small steps toward getting back the best part.
make your own direction and reason
by: ronaldj

Forget work? if you can? it should not be and is not your true identity?.

I retired last October, going on 15 months? I have been so busy I cannot figure out how I went to work? playing with grandchildren, remolding two daughters homes? volunteering at our church and Christian school? reading a book a week? doing what I want.. when I want?

I only miss working with my boy, we both worked for the same contractor? I see him and he will tell of a job and in about a nano second ? I am not sad I left? not for one second...

you are not a cartoonist, are you? i like to write short clips and need an artest (for fun)

Wendy: Ronald... I love your comment that work should not be your identity. You are so correct, and yet it is/was for so many of us! Thanks for posting!

P.S. if you have any short clips or cartoons of seniors and retirement, I'd love to publish them on my pages!

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