Save Your Marriage from Divorce
by Wendy, www.retirement-online.com
Save Your Marriage
Today, I am writing about how to save your marriage from a divorce. I really hate the idea of divorce later in life... but it happens even after retirement.
Keeping the relationship happy and positive isn't always easy!
I watched so many divorces get so mean, when the partners had to split pensions. The attorneys don't mind at all, and sometimes might even provoke the parties, as they are earning money for each hour spent on the divorce... right? Nowadays, pensions are split by Domestic Relationship Orders (before retirement). Don't let your marriage get to this point, no way!
A healthy relationship takes conscious effort. It's relatively easy to walk away, not so easy to keep a married relationship working a lifetime. There are ups and downs, of course, but please try to make it through those down times.
While relationships are frequently complicated, simple ideas can sometimes have a big effect on the marriage. The suggestions below can help to get a struggling relationship back on track, or keep an already satisfying one on the right path.
Please... If you have an idea that works well in your marriage, please add it in the comments!
Avoid taking your relationship for granted. "Love" is a verb, an action. Everything tends to degrade over time unless energy is put into it. Without energy and attention, most in life will eventually fall apart. Relationships are no different. Without some attention along the way, they will degrade over time as well. Be kind to one another.
Make time for togetherness activities. Making time for this doesn't even have to be expensive; some of the best things are free. It's really about spending some of your retirement time together.
-- Go get ice cream at the Dairy Queen.
-- Go to the Library or a free seminar together.
-- A walk around the neighborhood (maybe while you hold hands).
-- Little notes and small gifts are a simple and easy way to keep joy in your relationship.
Any time together can make a world of difference -- step away from the tv and the computer, for a few minutes, and do something together.
Date your partner. Dating tends to stop pretty quickly in most relationships. But your retirement doesn't have to be that way.
-- Go out to breakfast or lunch (cheaper than dinner if you are counting pennies).
-- Do dinner somewhere different every week.
-- Go to a matinee, it's not expensive.
-- Take a drive around town, stop for coffee and a piece of pie.
-- Take a senior day trip, jump on the bus and enjoy the day together, touring somewhere you both have never been before.
-- Experiment and bring adventures, big or small, into both of your lives.
Don't be afraid of professional help. If you can't figure it out on your own, seek professional assistance. You don't fix your car yourself or perform surgery on yourself; you get an expert. If your relationship is really struggling, bring in an expert. That's what they're there for.
A long-term relationship can be one of the most rewarding parts of life. You have someone who cares about you and someone you care for. You can share all of life's challenges, joys, and pains as a partnership. Your history together brings many memories and closeness. For most people, this is much more satisfying than being alone (but not always, I understand that too).
If this relationship is one of the most significant aspects of your life; give it the attention it deserves.
Please... If you have an idea that works well in your marriage, please add it in the comments!
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